Easter Feature

We come around to the Easter long weekend again. Always great to have an extra day off! There is a billboard I drive by on my way home that is just a silhouette of a bunny and the cross and it just says "It's not all about the bunny" or something like that. I disagree. The bunny is the most important part! This is a bunny that lays chocolate eggs! Do you know what kind of scientific.....stuff...could be learned from a creature like this! And he still has everyones best interests at heart. He/She just brings chocolate to the good boys and girls to rot their teeth out for the tooth fairy, thus keeping the proud tooth ecomonomies strong and healthy.

Unlike the teeth.

Not only that, but I'm pretty sure God and Jesus would be alright with the Easter bunny. A cute fuzzy thing that people can love. It's not like we worship them as a god so I think the commandments are safe. It's just something to help brighten people's lives. Better than all that talk of NAILING SOMEONE TO A CROSS. That shit should NOT be rated E for every...time.

It all reminds me of the one time when I was 27 and I hung out with Joseph, Jesus' birth dad. We were having a 3000 year old bottle of Jack when he said the most profound thing I've ever heard: "Sometimes you gotta eat the bunny. Sometimes you gotta eat his chocolate eggs." Powerful stuff.

I've also made it no secret that, despite growing up Catholic, I am not a Catholic. I am not religious. I don't feel like this billboard is going to turn people around and make them think. If you want to do that, maybe sell off some of the gold you are hoarding and help the less fortunate with it. But, this post isn't about that. This post is about me being silly about the Easter Bunny. So, without further ado, a poem about the Easter Bunny.

Hop Hop.

Brave the road!

Hop Hop.

Brave the field!

Hop Hop.

Brave the mode! (of transportation)

Hop Hop.

Brave to wield! (er of weapons)

Behold! Poor hopper!

The chocolate dispenser!

The egg dropper!

Just remember the censer.

The brown he delivers.

The clown he does not.

And egg for your silvers.

Cadbury for your pot.

HOP HOP!

Across the world.

HOP HOP!

Across the sea.

HOP HOP!

Across the sky.

HOP HOP!

Once more for me.

Thank you, and goodnight.